New York is dead and never coming back? Well the future is more really big building with people crammed together!

Future so bright I gotta wear shades!

Read more at nypost.

Hey Minnesota be easy on yourself. It’s not your fault. It’s fucking South Dakota! The CDC says
“The motorcycle rally was held in a neighboring state that did not have policies regarding event size and mask use, underscoring the implications of policies within and across jurisdictions.”

At least they got to see Smash Mouth!

Read more at mediaite.

If your kids are worried about Santa Claus being a super spreader, you can tell them Dr. Fauci says Santa is immune.

I don’t care what Fauci says, that fat man better be wearing a mask when he squeezes down that chimney.

Read more at fox8.com.

Looks like we just found the secret of the ooze, eh???

Read more at nypost.

Nothing to see here – just a sinkhole on Hastings Ave. in Leslieville #Toronto pic.twitter.com/GvOtKzqDal

— blogTO (@blogTO) November 20, 2020

Take a look at these faces – they’re not actually real people, they’ve been created by AI businesses that make fake humans. Between this and robot dogs, the human race is in deep trouble.

Recognize any of these people? From Facebook? Twitter?

These images are not real — they’re from the mind of a computer, and they’re infiltrating the internet.

We set up our own AI system to understand how this technology works. https://t.co/rNQXV2jh73

— The New York Times (@nytimes) November 21, 2020

Sources close to Sean Payton are saying he’s starting Taysom Hill today because he “just wants to know” if Hil has what it takes to be the Saints next franchise QB. This must really be hurting Crab Legs feelings right now.

Of all the reasons to start Taysom Hill over Jameis Winston, one stands out: #Saints coach Sean Payton “just wants to know,” those close to him say. Is Hill the next franchise QB? The evaluation starts today.

A look at what’s next: https://t.co/rMsx7qEooc

— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) November 22, 2020

2019 winner Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson congratulated Michael B. Jordan on being named People Magazine’s Sexist Man Alive for 2020, but jokingly added in a tweet, ‘I concede nothing’. The Rock is hoping that a Florida recount puts him over.

Read more at deadline.

Really Mark? You didn’t even keep the album? Then what was this all for?

You shit eating eating fuck stick.

Read more at yahoo.com.

Michael B. Jordan is the sexiest man alive according to People Magazine and now he is Joining Only Fans.

This better not just be cheesecake shots of your abs. We need something to get us through 2020, Michael B!

Read more at buzzfeed.com.

Euphoria star Loukas Gage shared the moment a director insulted his apartment on Zoom, thinking he was on mute.

Well that was cringey, but at least he wasn’t masturbating!

psa if youre a shit talking director make sure to mute ur shit on zoom mtgings pic.twitter.com/PTgMZcRhEw

— lukas gage (@lukasgage) November 20, 2020

Sonny Starkey, grandson of Ringo Starr and Liam Gallagher’s son Gene and model Noel Ponte all plead not guilty to charges stemming a fight at a London convenience store last year. The trio allegedly fought with a security guard after trying to buy beer after the store’s curfew. Sorry kids, the get out of jail free card only applies to actual rock stars.

Read more at pagesix.

everything

Just another day in Florida. Taking the puppy for a walk when gator snatches and takes it for a death roll.

“Fuck that noise” Yells Florida man. And never drops his cigar.

Read more at cnn.

My man saved his puppy from an alligator and kept smoking his cigar! pic.twitter.com/57s5x3U13Q

— Clay Travis (@ClayTravis) November 22, 2020

If you want to see Santa this year, you’re gonna have to do so with him behind plexiglass. So this year it’s like Santa is in prison and you’re coming by to put some cash in his commissary.

Santa Claus is coming to town — but you can't sit on his lap this year.

Malls are using plexiglas screens and temperature checks to safely have Santa in their stores this year pic.twitter.com/Mi0cAlU40o

— Bloomberg Quicktake (@Quicktake) November 16, 2020

Mel Magazine is saying the episode of Degrassi where a school shooter shoots drake in the back and then gets killed himself is the most important Very Special Episode of a TV show ever. They must not have seen the Saved By The Bell where Jessie gets addicted to caffeine pills. Horrifying.

Read more at melmagazine.com.